Should We Have Fellowship With Unbelievers?

[Goodboy]

While I am sure I have read the following Bible scripture before, I only just today fully realized what it could be saying based on what I heard some Christian state on the Internet?

King James Bible Version
2 Corinthians 6:14 Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?
2 Corinthians 6:15 And what concord hath Christ with Belial? or what part hath he that believeth with an infidel?
2 Corinthians 6:16 And what agreement hath the temple of God with idols? for ye are the temple of the living God; as God hath said, I will dwell in them, and walk in them; and I will be their God, and they shall be my people.
2 Corinthians 6:17 Wherefore come out from among them, and be ye separate, saith the Lord, and touch not the unclean thing; and I will receive you,
2 Corinthians 6:18 And will be a Father unto you, and ye shall be my sons and daughters, saith the Lord Almighty.

Contemporary English Bible Version
2 Corinthians 6:14 Stay away from people who are not followers of the Lord! Can someone who is good get along with someone who is evil? Are light and darkness the same?
2 Corinthians 6:15 Is Christ a friend of Satan? Can people who follow the Lord have anything in common with those who don't?
2 Corinthians 6:16 Do idols belong in the temple of God? We are the temple of the living God, as God himself says, "I will live with these people and walk among them. I will be their God, and they will be my people."
2 Corinthians 6:17 The Lord also says, "Leave them and stay away! Don't touch anything that isn't clean. Then I will welcome you
2 Corinthians 6:18 and be your Father. You will be my sons and my daughters, as surely as I am God, the All-Powerful."

All I was ever taught from Pastors I listened to was the first part of 2 Corinthians 6:14 which says "Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers". The Pastors used this verse to say we should not marry someone who is not a Christian. While I would agree that this scripture does make that point, to me reading the whole passage it seems to me like it is talking about more than just marriage. Don't get me wrong though, we do need to share the Gospel with unbelievers so if that is our goal, it is certainly not referring to that.

So is this passage just speaking of marriage or who all we should fellowship with? I would be interested in what others think?

 

[lismore]

So is this passage just speaking of marriage or who all we should fellowship with? I would be interested in what others think?

I was speaking with a retired AOG pastor some years ago and he said that as a young believer he had gone into a business partnership with an unbeliever which led to a clash of values and regrets on his part. The partnership was terminated in the end because their worldviews just couldn't align. Non Christians can have a completely different set of ethics and moral compass from believers, so any kind of deep relationship could be problematic. God Bless You

 

[Goodboy]

I was speaking with a retired AOG pastor some years ago and he said that as a young believer he had gone into a business partnership with an unbeliever which led to a clash of values and regrets on his part.

Yeah, business partnerships is what the Christian I heard on the Internet was speaking about. Regarding how some famous and rich Pastors are in partnerships with rich and famous unbelievers. I can see how that could be a problem, especially if you read Paul's writing to Timothy below. Who one hangs out with affects one's reputation. Even unbelievers understand that.

King James Bible Version
1 Timothy 3:1 This is a true saying, If a man desire the office of a bishop, he desireth a good work.
1 Timothy 3:2 A bishop then must be blameless, the husband of one wife, vigilant, sober, of good behaviour, given to hospitality, apt to teach;
1 Timothy 3:3 Not given to wine, no striker, not greedy of filthy lucre; but patient, not a brawler, not covetous;
1 Timothy 3:4 One that ruleth well his own house, having his children in subjection with all gravity;
1 Timothy 3:5 (For if a man know not how to rule his own house, how shall he take care of the church of God?)
1 Timothy3:6 Not a novice, lest being lifted up with pride he fall into the condemnation of the devil.
1 Timothy 3:7 Moreover he must have a good report of them which are without; lest he fall into reproach and the snare of the devil.

Contemporary English Bible Version
1 Timothy 3:1 It is true that anyone who desires to be a church official wants to be something worthwhile.
1 Timothy 3:2 That's why officials must have a good reputation and be faithful in marriage. They must be self-controlled, sensible, well-behaved, friendly to strangers, and able to teach.
1 Timothy 3:3 They must not be heavy drinkers or troublemakers. Instead, they must be kind and gentle and not love money.
1 Timothy 3:4 Church officials must be in control of their own families, and they must see that their children are obedient and always respectful.
1 Timothy 3:5 If they don't know how to control their own families, how can they look after God's people?
1 Timothy 3:6 They must not be new followers of the Lord. If they are, they might become proud and be doomed along with the devil.
1 Timothy 3:7 Finally, they must be well-respected by people who are not followers. Then they won't be trapped and disgraced by the devil.

 

[Ghoti Ichthus]

Given the damage inflicted on my spiritual, emotional, mental, and physical health by having been in close, prolonged contact with an unbeliever during the last multiple years, I'd say it means all relationships, especially those that preclude taking a real break and/or interfere with fellowship with other believers and God.

Stress kills, and the stress of unrelenting contact with an unbeliever is horrible. When multiple unbelievers join in, it could be enough to drive someone to drastic action. Only God prevented this, but by the end, I had nothing left with which to fight. I'm still hurting and it will be a very long time before I'm "fixed."

The unbelievers are now intent on having a separate, publicly-announced, memorial service next month because they were very unhappy and opposing to the traditional Lutheran funeral service we had for Dad, which is what Dad and we wanted. The unkind, nasty things that were said and emailed (and done) to me by these unbelievers before and after Dad's death, simply unbelievable. Unfortunately, at least one of these unbelievers used to be a professing Christian (please no OSAS discussion).

I have not yet decided whether or not I will attend, although the "friend" invited me, along with many others. I will, however, provide a copy of the eulogy my Dad wrote for himself (not used at the funeral because very inappropriate), to them since they almost certainly want to turn this into a worship of Dad

One thing that I will strictly enforce wherever I end up living is NO unbelievers and NO believers, who are openly sinning so that it could besmirch the witness or reputation of Christians/the church, will set foot inside my residence/property to the extent possible (may not have a choice if a landlord uses a non-Christian plumber, etc.). This includes my mentally ill, homeless sibling, whose actions are clearly influenced by demons, as well as mental illness, and possibly (recently disclosed) drugs
I can't and won't go through it again My other sibling and I haven't told the "friend" or any other family we've been in contact with my mentally ill sibling, for fear of what they would do to create further spiritual problems to my sick sibling, and split the three of us, to include pressuring me into taking care of the sick sibling (I CAN'T and WON'T do it).

 

[Margery]

I was always taught that yoke was either marriage or business whether it’s a volunteer or paid partnership. People have to pull in the same direction and that’s easier if they’re both under God.

Friendships will pull in a direction too. God can drop people in our lives to witness to them and the pull is towards the Lord. My hairdresser- I have been witnessing to her, praying for her and her family since 2003. I see slow progress but it’s progress. She stays.

But sometimes our time together with an unsaved friend or acquaintance comes to an end when they’re pulling away towards the world or the devil. I have an online acquaintance that is pulling away and I know my time spent on reaching her is ending.

It has to end immediately if they’re pulling us towards the world or the devil.

edited to add I agree 100% with @Ghoti Ichthus above. If they’re destructive we must remove ourselves from harm and allow God to work without getting in the way.

 

[mattfivefour]

I agree with the desires presented upthread. We want to keep ourselves unstained from the world, as James says we should in James 1:27b . But, dear saints, it is hard to be respected, to have others have a good report of you, if you isolate from them. What attracts others to Christ is to up-close observe the spirit of God in you. They may not understand what it is, but they know there is something different about you.

My practice is to fellowship with anybody who would like to fellowship. I believe that is scriptural. Remember what Paul wrote to the Corinthians-- "I wrote you in my letter not to associate with sexually immoral people. I was not including the sexually immoral of this world, or the greedy and swindlers, or idolaters. In that case you would have to leave this world." (1 Corinthians 5:9-10) Paul goes on to say that when he says do not associate with an immoral person, he was speaking of someone who claimed to be a brother in Christ but who brought immoral disgrace to the name of Christ. As he says, he did not mean withdraw from the world. For it is the world to which we are sent. We are ambassadors from God to them.

But I will never be yoked to a non-believer, in business, or in anything else. I will be a friend and lovee and help them when they need help, but I will not engage in any activity that would dishonor God. Nor will I try to walk around trying to look holier than them. I will always pray to be humble and gentle and kind and filled with the joy of the Lord, when I am with them. You would be surprised at the opportunities with which God presents us when we walk according to His Word, loving others.

 

[Goodboy]

All good responses.

What I am kind of getting from what has been said is to decide whether the unbeliever is affecting you or you are affecting the unbeliever?

I think if you are affecting the unbeliever, it comes under the category of witnessing. Witnessing is not just what we say, but what we do and how we act, meaning being a good example. As an example, my old boss cursed a lot like everyone else did at my old job. He would however try hard not to curse around me though and if he did he would apologize.

If the unbeliever is affecting you like causing you to sin or act inappropriately, then I think that is not a good relationship to have. If you are affecting the unbeliever, he just might get saved!

 

[Ghoti Ichthus]

There is a huge difference performing one's earthly job in a way that reflects salt and light to unbelievers and having a close relationship or fellowshipping with them. When I was LE, I didn't have a social relationship with people I met on the job, whether coworker or otherwise. When I left work, I had the opportunity to recuperate from whatever.

Jesus showed this example when He retreated from crowds with His disciples, had the Last Supper with His disciples, etc.

 

[mattfivefour]

All good responses.

What I am kind of getting from what has been said is to decide whether the unbeliever is affecting you or you are affecting the unbeliever?

I think if you are affecting the unbeliever, it comes under the category of witnessing. Witnessing is not just what we say, but what we do and how we act, meaning being a good example. As an example, my old boss cursed a lot like everyone else did at my old job. He would however try hard not to curse around me though and if he did he would apologize.

If the unbeliever is affecting you like causing you to sin or act inappropriately, then I think that is not a good relationship to have. If you are affecting the unbeliever, he just might get saved!

Bingo!!!

 

[Andy C]

But I will never be yoked to a non-believer, in business, or in anything else. I will be a friend and lovee and help them when they need help, but I will not engage in any activity that would dishonor God. Nor will I try to walk around trying to look holier than them. I will always pray to be humble and gentle and kind and filled with the joy of the Lord, when I am with them. You would be surprised at the opportunities with which God presents us when we walk according to His Word, loving others.

Amen. We cant help them if we're not around them.

 

[pixelpusher]

But sometimes our time together with an unsaved friend or acquaintance comes to an end when they’re pulling away towards the world or the devil.

I had to end a friendship with a guy I met on the river and we started paddling together. There were warning signs, but I figured God put him in my path, so I did witness to him. Then he divorced his wife, and just spiraled into madness. It was time to get back before I got sucked in. I hope some of the seeds grow.

Two other paddling buddies, both the retired Marines, whom I also shoot with, are unbelievers, but they are not crazy, so they remain because I do get to witness to them. The one is more agnostic than atheist, he says we just can't know, but if he could know, he's not opposed to believing. There is promise there. The other fellow was brought up Methodist, but now has syncretic beliefs. Both of them know the Gospel, but have not made the transaction of belief. They don't act like unbelievers tho. I wonder if the man who was brought up Methodist may have been saved young, but has turned away.

I work for unbelievers. And I put my hand to the mouse and keyboard as unto the Lord, and not men, and they see this.

But I am not "yoked" to any of them, as in a marriage or business partnership. To be in a yoke to me implies you don't have a choice.

 

[Goodboy]

The one is more agnostic than atheist, he says we just can't know, but if he could know, he's not opposed to believing.

Just a suggestion.

There are at least two reasons that we can know and also many prophesies that have come true from the Bible.

1) Creation shows that there must be a creator, thus there is a God.
Romans 1:20 For the invisible things of him from the creation of the world are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even his eternal power and Godhead; so that they are without excuse:

2) Who is this God?
Ask your friend what year it is. Then ask him what that year is based on. Jesus! That should at least give a hint regarding who our God is verses other religions. God has caused time itself to be based on his son. Other religions have nothing close to the significance of that fact.

 

[lismore]

Just a suggestion.

There are at least two reasons that we can know and also many prophesies that have come true from the Bible.

1) Creation shows that there must be a creator, thus there is a God.
Romans 1:20 For the invisible things of him from the creation of the world are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even his eternal power and Godhead; so that they are without excuse:

2) Who is this God?
Ask your friend what year it is. Then ask him what that year is based on. Jesus! That should at least give a hint regarding who our God is verses other religions. God has caused time itself to be based on his son. Other religions have nothing close to the significance of that fact.

Amen!

Another one might be the seven day week:

Exodus 20: 11 For in six days the Lord made the heavens and the earth, the sea, and all that is in them, but he rested on the seventh day. Therefore the Lord blessed the Sabbath day and made it holy.

Various athiestic societies have tried to end the seven day week for the reason above, for example Maximilien Robespierre during the French Revolution mandated a ten day week. It didn't work, the seven day week is a permanent, irremovable reminder of that first week of creation. God Bless All

 

[Ronnie]

Jesus was the friend of sinners, but he didn't partake of their sin neither did he facilitate their sin.

 

[pixelpusher]

Just a suggestion.

There are at least two reasons that we can know and also many prophesies that have come true from the Bible.

1) Creation shows that there must be a creator, thus there is a God.
Romans 1:20 For the invisible things of him from the creation of the world are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even his eternal power and Godhead; so that they are without excuse:

2) Who is this God?
Ask your friend what year it is. Then ask him what that year is based on. Jesus! That should at least give a hint regarding who our God is verses other religions. God has caused time itself to be based on his son. Other religions have nothing close to the significance of that fact.

Indeed, good suggestions. I spent almost 30 minutes talking about general revelation while we were riding to the beach one day. Did not faze him that I could see, but he also didn't mind listening. I had not thought to talk about our dating system, but he would just say that was historical or something. I talked about Prophecy, about how Israel was out of their land, returned with their national language and customs intact, things that have been fulfilled, and his answer was that humans are good at seeing patterns. He's a math guy. I'm not, so I haven't tried any of the mathematical proofs, cause one I don't understand them myself. As far as I got with that was mentioning that 1.618 was an interesting number that I believed shows evidence of a Designer, but he just grinned. (That is the Golden ratio).

Maybe my job with him is just planting.

EtA: but any indication of sprouting shows, I will water that! Carefully, not to drown it.

 

[1LoverofGod]

There are two ways of looking at "fellowship" with unbelievers.
Jesus sat and ate with sinners and the Pharasees rebuked him for it.
But Jesus motive for sitting in the company of sinners was solely to give them salvation.

"Then all the tax collectors and the sinners drew near to Him to hear Him. 2 And the Pharisees and scribes complained, saying, “This Man receives sinners and eats with them.” 3 So He spoke this parable to them, saying:

4 “What man of you, having a hundred sheep, if he loses one of them, does not leave the ninety-nine in the wilderness, and go after the one which is lost until he finds it? 5 And when he has found it, he lays it on his shoulders, rejoicing. 6 And when he comes home, he calls together his friends and neighbors, saying to them, ‘Rejoice with me, for I have found my sheep which was lost!’ 7 I say to you that likewise there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine just persons who need no repentance."
Luke 15:1-7

Now, to fellowship with unbelievers for the purposes of having a "good time", where the Gospel of Salvation is never mentioned, could be a snare for the believer because the worldly atmosphere can be damaging to the believer.
As the saying goes, the more time we spend with certain people, the more their ways will rub off on us.

"Do not be deceived: “Bad company ruins good morals.”
1 Corinthians 15:33

"Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm"
Proverbs 13:20

"Make no friendship with a man given to anger, nor go with a wrathful man, lest you learn his ways and entangle yourself in a snare"
Proverbs 22:24-25

"I do not sit with men of falsehood, nor do I consort with hypocrites. I hate the assembly of evildoers, and I will not sit with the wicked"
Psalm 26:4-5

 

[Baby Yoda]

Maybe my job with him is just planting.

That's how I have come to regard my coworkers, and they have let me plant.....

 

[Eric Nicholas]

This may sound abrasive, but it's all the more reason that I reject quoting single verses almost entirely. We don't even do that with secular literature, and it leads to confusion upon confusion. "But here it says this verse and over here it says this verse and those are contradictory!", said frustrated and confused multitudes before us and definitely after us, should time go on. It's how false religions, false gospels, cults, fights, broken relationships, and all-around improper exegesis have been carried out and I don't care to be a part of it. I've been in so many conversations with saint and sinner alike, and single verses being flung about carelessly have overwhelmingly caused high tensions and absurd arguments that could have been entirely avoided had contextualization prevailed. Even something as simple and short as "Jesus wept.", without context, there's no way to have any idea what that even means apart from the most rudimentary understanding that there was/is an entity named Jesus and he wept. But when properly understood and contextualized, it reveals such a deep, wonderful, loving, and clear counsel, lost in the simplicity of zippy one-liners. But those are just two words and easy to understand on their own to boot and if that can be confused, imagine heavier and more lengthy verses and the damage wrought.

With that said, I had an atheist and homosexual friend named Mike. He was a lawyer up in NYC and he was not at all typical of what you imagine when you think of someone like that, not to mention someone like that from NYC! Hahaha! He had a gun on his hip (when he could) and was very against the exaltation of unchecked liberal lunacy. But we didn't really clash at all, despite our obvious polar opposite beliefs and behaviors. He passed on so young, about 11 years back now. I do recall sharing the Gospel and debating the origins of the universe, rights, laws, and how those can (cannot) be justified under materialism or really any other belief system that has a standard bearer of relativism. Ugh, and far be it for me to sound like I'm patting myself on the back, but he was thankful for our conversations. He said they kept him up at night, but he loved talking about it and would often text me or call wanting to talk about those very subjects. His heart stopped suddenly one night, and I got the news over the phone. I hadn't talked to him for some time before his passing, but I hope I'll see him on those celestial shores.

 

[Margery]

This may sound abrasive, but it's all the more reason that I reject quoting single verses almost entirely. We don't even do that with secular literature, and it leads to confusion upon confusion. "But here it says this verse and over here it says this verse and those are contradictory!", said frustrated and confused multitudes before us and definitely after us, should time go on. It's how false religions, false gospels, cults, fights, broken relationships, and all-around improper exegesis have been carried out and I don't care to be a part of it. I've been in so many conversations with saint and sinner alike, and single verses being flung about carelessly have overwhelmingly caused high tensions and absurd arguments that could have been entirely avoided had contextualization prevailed. Even something as simple and short as "Jesus wept.", without context, there's no way to have any idea what that even means apart from the most rudimentary understanding that there was/is an entity named Jesus and he wept. But when properly understood and contextualized, it reveals such a deep, wonderful, loving, and clear counsel, lost in the simplicity of zippy one-liners. But those are just two words and easy to understand on their own to boot and if that can be confused, imagine heavier and more lengthy verses and the damage wrought.

With that said, I had an atheist and homosexual friend named Mike. He was a lawyer up in NYC and he was not at all typical of what you imagine when you think of someone like that, not to mention someone like that from NYC! Hahaha! He had a gun on his hip (when he could) and was very against the exaltation of unchecked liberal lunacy. But we didn't really clash at all, despite our obvious polar opposite beliefs and behaviors. He passed on so young, about 11 years back now. I do recall sharing the Gospel and debating the origins of the universe, rights, laws, and how those can (cannot) be justified under materialism or really any other belief system that has a standard bearer of relativism. Ugh, and far be it for me to sound like I'm patting myself on the back, but he was thankful for our conversations. He said they kept him up at night, but he loved talking about it and would often text me or call wanting to talk about those very subjects. His heart stopped suddenly one night, and I got the news over the phone. I hadn't talked to him for some time before his passing, but I hope I'll see him on those celestial shores.

Eric I hope and pray that you will see him again, rejoicing in God's presence together. I have to say, if God put you together for you to share, and him to think deeply, that the seeds went deep and God who knows the moment of our death, knew and put you in his path in time.

 

[Eric Nicholas]

Eric I hope and pray that you will see him again, rejoicing in God's presence together. I have to say, if God put you together for you to share, and him to think deeply, that the seeds went deep and God who knows the moment of our death, knew and put you in his path in time.

That is such a wonderful thought and hope to get us through these days we find ourselves in. Thank you, Margery.